Under The Influence
by trythisforexample
Summary: Jacob and Edward are both overwhelmed by the force of the imprint. After accepting what nature dictated, together they try to learn and handle this strange and intense phenomenon..


Jacob was pissed off.

Really, _really _pissed off, and if he didn't think his Dad would kill him for it the shifter would have probably phased right there and then in his living room. Out of the desire to stay alive though, Jacob simply pinched the bridge of his nose in an attempt to calm down.

It was 1:30 in the morning and far from being in bed sound asleep like he _wanted _to be, the young Quileute man was instead pacing his house in a flurry of emotions, anger to longing to frustration and back to longing again.

'Come _on _Jacob' He muttered to himself, pulling at his black hair with a sigh and trying miserably to pretend like his stomach wasn't swimming in sadness, in longing to march out and run to that big stupid house with the big stupid windows and the big stupid vampires that lived there.

He tried, he really did and the shifter's bottom lip jutted out, sulking in the unfairness of it all.

And really, this imprint was _so _unfair.

There were a lot of reasons for that too. Reasons past the initial self-loathing and the fact that Edward almost tried to kill him and the fact that his pack did the same. All of that, Jacob could deal with. All of that, he had expected.

What he hadn't expected was how much it fucking _hurt_, because sure Sam had told him over and over how strong the force of imprinting was, how a wolf's imprint became his world and his only reason for living.

He knew all that, he did but damn, was it _really _supposed to be _this _painful? Was it supposed to keep him awake at night?

Jacob didn't think so but it certainly was, hence why the shifter was battling himself minute by minute not to phase out of pure anger, anger because he was tired and he just wanted to _sleep_, would have been able to if it weren't for that fucking _pain_ in his stomach, pain caused by the stupid pretty vampire with bronze hair and the icy skin that complimented Jacob's own so well.

His need to sleep was overwhelmed so _badly _by the need to see Edward and _that _was why the wolf was so mad. Imprint or no imprint, it was pathetic that even after seeing the vampire mere hours ago Jacob was pacing around like a lost puppy now, unable to sleep because he just _missed _Edward. He missed him so badly and it was infuriating to the young shifter.

'Stupid fucking Edward' He grumbled, and he knew he didn't mean it, it was hard to sound as though his words were meant with any malice when he spoke them so softly, a tone of need dripping from every syllable.

This whole imprinting business was becoming far too much for Jacob. He was drowning in it and it was getting hard to stay afloat, though not for the reasons most of his pack seemed to think.

Quil and Embry and certainly Paul assumed that he was still despairing over the fact that it was _Edward _he'd imprinted on..a vampire.. an _enemy_.

It was a fair enough assumption Jacob supposed, but it wasn't correct. He'd gotten over _who_ his imprint was long ago.

His problem now simply lied in the intensity of it all. Because it was so all-consuming that intense didn't even seem like a fitting word for it anymore. It was overwhelming, to suddenly only have one thing on his mind, one aim and one concern every single minute of the day. It was overwhelming that the sun rose and set with Edward, and that Jacob couldn't even _sleep _anymore because he missed the vampire when he did so.

It was the fact that the imprint just never let up, never gave him a break. The absolute _need _to be with Edward, the need to touch him and to love him never ceased for a single second and _that _was the hard part, particularly when the vampire was still coming to terms with the imprint himself, still coming to terms with the fact that his former enemy now wanted to do all the things to him that he sometimes caught Jacob fantasizing about in his mind, when the wolf forgot to shield his thoughts.

He was still adjusting, and though the shifter found it terribly hard to have any ounce of patience when it came to his imprint he was often reminded-by himself and by the rest of the Cullen's- that he was lucky to even be getting a _chance _with Edward.

Because it hadn't been easy, the vampire hadn't fallen into his arms and the pair hadn't confessed undying love to one another. Hell, when Edward first learned of the imprint he smashed Jacob's head against a tree and tried to strangle him.

Progressing from there to where they were now, to where Edward was being open-minded and even allowing Jacob to be in presence, was an achievement that the shifter had to keep reminding himself of.

Even though he wanted so much more, the fact that Edward let him stay close by had to be enough for now. Jacob could at least agree with his pack that it was better than how things had been in the beginning, when Edward rejected the imprint.

It wasn't something the pack had experienced before, and neither they nor Jacob had been prepared for the devastating effects it had on the young shifter. He became a wreck so quickly, longing for his imprint to the point where eating, drinking and sleeping became distant memories. More than a few times, Jacob had felt on the verge of death, and on those occasions he'd welcomed the prospect, anything to escape the all-consuming pain that had ravished him over those few weeks.

It still hurt to remember even now, Jacob once again acknowledging that even though things weren't how he wanted them to be with Edward at least he still got to see the vampire, still got to ease the never-ending ache in his stomach every now and then.

That was why Jacob was fighting himself so hard as he paced his living room, trying and trying again to resist the urges he felt. He didn't want to pressure Edward, he didn't want to put one tiny foot wrong and ruin the baby steps they'd taken over the past three months.

He couldn't push the vampire, not if he wanted this thing to have any chance at all, and the sad truth of that made the shifter whine longingly as he flicked off the lights and headed upstairs to his room with a resigned grumble.

Once stretched out in his bed the shifter tried to console himself with memories from earlier that day, hours he'd spent at the Cullen house just sitting with Edward, learning about his family, about what he liked and didn't like.

Before the imprint Jacob was never a good listener, still wasn't except when it came to his imprint. Not only did the wolf listen to Edward but he actually _liked _to listen, liked learning as much as he possibly could about the bronze-haired vampire in the few hours that he was allowed. Even though being with Edward was sometimes a tiring task given that he had to both conceal his thoughts from the vampire and also resist, well, touching him, those few hours were everything to Jacob. It was the only time when the longing eased up and the wolf was grateful for that.

Grateful enough to know he shouldn't push things any further, at least not for today, and with that the shifter sighed and buried his head in his pillow, Edward inevitably scattered through his restless dreams.

X X X

One of the most bizarre things about this imprint, in Edward's opinion, was the fact that for some reason no-one was sure of, it meant that sometimes the vampire could actually feel what Jacob was feeling. Not through reading his thoughts, like Carlisle had initially assumed, but through something else. Like a wire connected the two. It was a strange sensation, and for the longest time Edward had put these weird feelings that certainly weren't his own down to Jasper, assuming his brother was attempting to be funny, meddling and casting certain moods over him. Only through Carlisle's endless research and Jasper's protests did they manage to come to the conclusion that it actually wasn't his brother that was tainting his emotions, but that it was Jacob.

Of all the bizarre things the imprinting entailed, this was probably the one that intrigued and baffled Edward the most. It was on his mind as he sat at the kitchen counter on a cloudy Saturday morning, remembering the unease that had been floating around him since the wolf had left his side yesterday. It was…strange, to know that Jacob's mood so badly deteriorated when Edward's presence was no longer there. Even though the Vampire couldn't physically sleep anyway, he'd been restless and agitated with his imprinter's emotions all night, and couldn't help but to wonder if the wolf had slept at all. Maybe there was a part of Edward that was angry that Jacob's emotions were passed through this…bond, to him, but really it was unfair to be upset with the shifter. Edward was aware he couldn't help it.

It made the vampire feel almost bad he realized, as he watched rain start to pour against the windows of his home, because what Jacob had been feeling last night was down to _Edward_, or lack of him.

It was confusing, to say the least, and the vampire almost wished Jacob were visiting earlier just so he'd _stop_ feeling so down right horrible.

In all of his years Edward had never been so confused by a concept so much as he was in regards to imprinting. It was almost unbelievable, how different both Jacob's thoughts and mood were when he was with Edward and when he was not. It was like night and day, fire and ice. What it also was, was utterly terrifying, and it took a lot to scare a vampire but this definitely had Edward out of his comfort zone.

Just four months ago Jacob Black was his enemy, for no particular reason other than that they were different, but an enemy all the same. Edward had spent all the years that they'd known each other hearing Jacob's endless thoughts of hatred, smirking at the shifter's various plans to kill Edward, or more comically to attack him with garlic. Their mutual hatred for one another had never really amounted to violence or anything near that, it was just a general dislike of each other but that was fine because they both knew where they stood. They were enemies, and that was that.

And now, to witness the change from before and after Jacob had imprinted was staggering. The first time the shifter had made a mental note that Edward was beautiful, the vampire almost fainted. Of course being a vampire that wasn't possible, but even now he still felt sure that were he human at that moment he most definitely would have passed out. And it was just so _overwhelming_, to catch these waves of emotion from Jacob even when they were far apart and to know that the shifter was feeling so bad because he _missed _Edward. It was overwhelming to know that Jacob pined to be near him.

It left Edward in limbo, more confused than he had been in all his years. Because when they'd been enemies that was easy, they hated each other and that was that. True their hatred was based on their elder's and times had most definitely changed, but the relationship between vampires and wolves was just as hostile as it always had been, and so with that it was easy for Edward and Jacob to follow suit.

But now that Jacob had imprinted and his pack were powerless but to accept Edward-even if it was begrudgingly- it left the vampire in the most confusing place possible because well, he wasn't sure how to feel. He was left to second guess himself, because did he _really _hate Jacob? He felt sure now that he didn't, it was hard to remember if he ever truly had and whether that was a result of the imprint or not it still left Edward almost dazed, unsure how to act around the wolf. One thing he knew was that it was impossible to even _attempt _to hate the shifter when Jacob was just so.._nice_ all the time. He was still the fiery Quileute Edward had always known, still said words to the vampire sometimes that were meant to sting but, his insults lost their bite when Edward could hear him regret his words in his head immediately afterwards.

It was just..Edward didn't know. Didn't know a word for it, couldn't even explain or understand any of what he was feeling right now.

But for the immediate future, all he knew was that he wished Jacob would arrive for their scheduled time together sooner, if only to stop that horrible longing Jacob was unknowingly pushing through the bond to Edward. The vampire did his best to convince himself that the feeling was entirely one-sided.

X X X

Jacob was still getting used to the imprint, and one part he was having particular difficulty with was that he was so _nervous_ whenever he was due to see Edward. It wasn't even nerves because of all the pressure that was mounting on him to do this right, but just regular old nerves that teenage girls feel when they go on their first date, and it was so embarrassing for Jacob because he felt more like a thirteen year old every time.

He was fresh out of the shower and standing in front of his mirror with sweat beads on his forehead, praying to god that inspiration would strike and tell him what to wear, what would look nice. The shifter wanted so badly not to care, to shrug and throw on any old outfit like he used to before the imprint, but as much as he tried to pretend Jacob couldn't bluff himself. He did care. He cared so much what Edward thought about him now, so much so that he was breaking into a sweat over what to wear.

'Get a grip Black' He grumbled to himself, eventually sighing and throwing on some black cut-off pants. He was planning to phase anyway, knowing he'd get to Edward quicker that way and the sooner he got to his imprint the sooner that stupid jabbing in his gut would stop, that constant reminder that he wasn't with his vampire.

Feeling uncomfortable at the thought of him Jacob sighed, resigned to the fact that his outfit was a lost cause as he tied a plain black shirt to his ankle, taking the stairs two at a time and leaving through the front porch. He stepped into the trees to remove his shorts, tying them along with the shirt and then phasing.

His heart was racing as he left the reservation, partly through the thrill of unleashing his wolf but mostly because he was going to see _Edward_, and the ache in his chest was lessening with every gallop and it felt amazing.

The nerves were still there though, as he lingered in the shadows of the Cullen household, returning to human form and re-dressing.

'Please don't throw up' He muttered to himself, acknowledging the lurching of his stomach and attempting to shrug it off with a deep breath. When he saw his imprint appear at the front door the walls immediately went up in Jacob's mind, masking a mix of _oh god he's so perfect dear god help me _and _holy shit do I look okay?_ in his head. It was better Edward didn't hear that stuff he decided, approaching the Cullen house with his hands shaking.

'Do you feel unwell?' Were the vampire's first words and Jacob wrinkled his nose.

'Huh?'

'You said something about throwing up...' Edward said softly and the shifter blushed, remembering his muttering and cursing himself for not remembering that his imprint's hearing was unbelievably good.

'I'm fine' He tried to brush it off 'Doesn't matter'.

He stepped into the household when Edward gestured him to, smiling at the cold bottle of water and plate of waffles that was always present every time he visited. Esme was his favourite Cullen he decided, after Edward of course.

'She likes you too'

Jacob jumped slightly, scowling at the vampire though not with much conviction. 'Stop doin' that'

He was pretty good at keeping Edward out of his head, but it got tiring and sometimes he slipped.

'Sorry' The vampire apologized. He sounded genuine enough for Jacob and the shifter shrugged, attention diverted when he realized there were no prying eyes around this time.

'My family are hunting' Edward explained, and he'd just read Jacob's thoughts again but the wolf just rolled his eyes this time.

'What about you? Don't you need to hunt?'

He cocked his head to one side, tell-tale dark irises looking back at him. _He's hungry_.

'I can manage until later' Edward explained, and Jacob couldn't help but to frown, wondering if he'd gotten in the way of the vampire feeding. He didn't want to do that..

'It's no inconvenience'

'Get out of my head!' Jacob exclaimed, though it came out with more of a laugh than the anger he'd intended it to. Edward seemed to have that effect.

His heart fluttered when the vampire smiled back at him, all pearly white teeth and bright eyes.

'I _am _sorry' He repeated again. 'It's hard though. As hard for me not to listen to you as it is for you to block your thoughts from me'

Jacob pondered that then, and okay, he sort of understood.

'Still' He shrugged, swallowing a piece of waffle and squeezing some more syrup onto the remaining ones. He loved the food at Edward's. Esme was quite the cook. Jacob found he always enjoyed his food more when he was with his imprint too. When he was with Edward he didn't have the longing gnawing away at him that usually staved off his appetite.

'You seem better now' Edward noted, and Jacob's eyebrows raised in question.

'Huh?'

The vampire shrugged in front of him, shuffling slightly. 'You were..anxious, last night. I felt it'

Anxious was an understatement, but Jacob was too busy blushing to mention that. He was angry at himself too.

'I'm sorry' He said honestly, frowning at himself, 'I'll try and.. I don't know.. keep it in'

'I wasn't trying to make you feel bad' Edward frowned, looking like Jacob had missed the point though the shifter shook his head in disagreement. His job was to make Edward _happy_, not to unnecessarily make him feel the grief that consumed Jacob every time they were apart. That was one part of the imprint that he hated, that Edward could _feel_ how pathetic the shifter was, how sad he was without the vampire. It was _embarrassing_.

'Jacob..' Edward frowned, 'You don't.. you don't need to be embarrassed. I'm sorry I brought it up but I just, I don't really know how you can deal with it. It's not a problem for me-honestly- because I don't sleep anyway but.. it must keep you awake, no?'

Jacob grimaced at his question and looked down at his waffles again, not trying to guard his mind from Edward this time.

_All the time_, He answered through thought, and it did, it always made for sleepless nights. _Part of the deal_.

'That doesn't seem very fair' Edward frowned, and Jacob laughed unhappily. None of this was fair.

He saw a strange look flash across the vampire's face just briefly and bit his lip, regretting his thoughts.

'I didn't mean..It's not that I don't want this it's just..'

He trailed off because really, what else could he say? Sighing in frustration he forced down the remaining waffle on his plate. They were still so new to this whole imprint thing, the both of them, and as hard and as confusing as it must have been for Edward it was hard for Jacob too. He was just as lost as the other boy was.

'I know'

Edward said the words softly in response to Jacob's thoughts, the Quileute boy looking up to meet his imprints eyes. They got a little warmer every day, Jacob thought, a little less guarded.

'This is just..intense, y'know?' He asked, hoping Edward would understand. 'I don't think any amount of advice from Sam could've ever prepared me for this and, I-I know you're a hell of a lot more confused than I am and I'm _trying _not to put any pressure on you but I can't help that you feel what I do through the imprint sometimes… I don't think I can anyway..'

'It's alright' The other boy said, voice soft as ever. 'Despite what you think I do know how difficult this is for you. I-I can't take this as fast as you would like me to-'

'I can wait' Jacob cut in, biting his lip after because he sounded desperate and needy and so unlike himself. He sort of wanted to disappear at that moment, wondering idly if Edward would follow him if he made a run for it.

'I would'

Jacob didn't allow his heart to flutter too much at the vampire's response, shrugging his shoulders with a sigh.

'We both know I'd come back anyway'.

X X X


End file.
